MY NAME IS WRITTEN.

I wrote this poem from a dream I had about God's Amazing Grace.


MY NAME IS WRITTEN. by Nelsa Simmonds


As I walked the streets of heaven
and stopped before your throne
I saw you crying silently
I saw you cry alone

I saw what you were sad about
and then I felt the shame
placed in the ground was a mountain of sin
and a plaque with my name

I saw the angels gathered about
all of them crying too
Where could I run and hide
Where could I run from you

Then an angel beaconed me
To come and stand with them
I shook my head and stood afar
But still he called my name

I said to them I cannot stand
Knowing my disgrace
Their eyes looked right into me
A strange look on their face

My child "You are mistaken,
We do not cry at sin
This pile of emotion that you see,
sitting in this hollow
Is not the sin you thought it was
Its a pile of your sorrow"

BOXED IN

Since my blog last week on Caged Hearts, I have had a lot of people talk to me about how they have been put in boxes or how they have been labeled by others and how very hard that is to deal with on a daily basis, so I thought it needed to be blogged about some more and in particular the dangers of being boxed in.

When we label someone because of something that has seemed to draw attention to a likeness or similarity in that person, we don't realise the impact that we are having on someones life by emphasizing it, or even causing someone else to think that way as well. Take for instance, an alarming fact that this boxing in happens very early in a child's life, it can be over some small incident that happened because of forgetting a lunch box 3 days in a row, or I have even heard of someone wetting their pants on the first day of school and the other kids still referring to it after 5 years, now we would think that these things are just small events and they should be, but to someone who gets labeled this way, it can turn into something quite horrifying.

What about when we are in the workplace and our boss labels us on a bad day and we struggle for months trying to get them to see a different picture, to replace the one that they have in their head, or just as often, we label our bosses, our parents, our neighbours, our politicians.

When we do this, we paint a picture inside our head that could be very very different to the truth and when I was thinking about this I was reminded about a time when a few years ago when we were visiting a Church that had a theme night, one of my sons was asking me a question that went like this...

SON -"Mum, what did you think about the ladies who were dancing erotically at church"

WELL, I have learned with this child not to answer too quickly, just to feel my way around some questions and this was the perfect example.

ME - "Ummmm, what do I think, about the ladies.... dancing erotically ... at church, Well, that's a great..... question, I guess that I think ..... I would think the same as if the ladies ..... were dancing erotically anywhere.. " (by this stage I was pretty certain he just had his words mixed up but my creative, fun filled mind wanted to know where we could go with this, I do love an opportunity to laugh through life!)

ME - "Sooo, what do YOU think about the ladies dancing erotically at church?"

SON - " Mum, do I have the wrong word?"

ME - "Quite possibly, you wanna give me an example of this erotic dancing?" hahaha

Well, we figured out that as a 9 year old, He actually meant erratic , that they were just all doing their own thing - not even or regular or in time with each other - as he thought they should be.

This conversation has given us many laughs, Just the other night He said to me "Hey Mum, What do you think of my erotic dancing"?

But now we use this as an example when someone puts us in a box or puts a label on us, we know we don't fit the small mindedness that boxing people in does, we need to shake it off and not agree when we know we are created for much more. And we also need to be aware of our own ways of labeling others, allowing them to grow through life and not adding to their hard times.

MUM - "I hate it when people make up their mind about me without finding out who I really am"

SON - " Don't worry Mum, they just think you're dancing erotically!"

special thanks to the lady in the picture, she is campaigning against human trafficking!

CAGED HEARTS

2011 was a great year for me...

not because everything went according to my plan,
or because the times were easy and without challenge.
No, I count my year great because I had a year of many lessons, lessons that I never would have learnt if my days were easy.

We want to believe that the people who are in our lives
have the best intention for us, that they are believing the
best in us and when we find otherwise and realise that
the world is full of people who have their own motives and agenda's, we have some choices to make. Do we go
along for the ride in the hope that the boxes that people
insist on putting us in will grow to the shape of our own
abilities and dreams, or do we realise that our hearts have become caged and we have learned to live half a life.

I spent a good part of 2011 trying to make a decision that would be the most honorable for all involved but ended up feeling the restrictions of the cage around my heart instead.

I cried out to God to help me know what was the best decision as I really wanted to do the right thing, and thats when I heard a voice like a whisper dropped into my Spirit, " I never intended for you to be caged, You only need to know whether your wings will be clipped or whether you will be allowed to fly".

And that's when I realised that all along, it was the box that was wrong.

LIMITATIONS

I tell myself and others regularly that we are only limited by our minds, but seriously thats all I need! I don't need other people or circumstances or things
to limit my life, my goals, my happiness, or my potential, my mind does very
well all by itself.

I find that I have the biggest struggles just before a breakthrough in what I wanted to achieve and this tells me that I just have to keep my mind fixed on the goal no matter what.

A few months ago I challenged myself to make a concious effort to keep on doing the things that I really want to and not to be hindered by anything along the way that would throw me off course, I am pleased to say that I kept to what I had resolved in my heart even though I was tested continually along the way.

"When a man has put a limit on what he will do,
he has put a limit on what he can do"
-Charles Schwab

Don't Limit Yourself!

KNOW YOURSELF!

I have pondered this question off and on over the
years and I can honestly say that if the world ended
tomorrow, Yes, I would be proud of myself, Why?
Because I'm doing everything right? Or even anything
right? No, I am proud of myself because I finally know
who I am and know who I was created to be, and the
more I know myself, the more I know that I will never
be all the things that you think that you should be or
what other people want you to be. And thats ok, I just
wanna be me!

On the journey of knowing myself, I continually ask
myself some questions, like...
1) What makes you peaceful?
2) What makes you feel strengthened?
3) What/Who leaves you feeling drained & empty?
4) Who/What fills you with energy? joy?
5) How do you look after yourself?
6) Is your life lined up with the values you have?

These answers will be as vastly different for everyone, even the questions we ask ourselves will be different, but the results if we choose to encourage ourselves when times are hard, to know ourselves enough to love ourselves by making healthy choices and are proud of the life we live, the end results will be the same - We will live better than we have before.

IF WE HAD A CHANCE TO MAKE ONE HEART OF TWO - I JUST WANNA DANCE WITH YOU.

27 Years ago today I married my best friend, Along the way we have had an amazing adventure, I am certain there have been times where I have driven him completely nuts and vice versa but today I have enjoyed thinking of a lot of the fun times and know that the best is yet to come.

I am very thankful that I am married to a man who wants to honor God with our lives and to use those lives to make a difference to humanity, I won't share this day with him as he is in Indonesia helping build an Orphanage, but we look forward to celebrating when he gets home next week.

We have been dancing to this song for nearly the whole of our marriage.

David, We danced together yesterday, we dance today alone, tomorrow we dance again. I love you. Nelsa

REMOVING THE ROADBLOCKS

A couple of days ago I set myself a goal to start and stick with my exercise program no matter what, so I got ready to go for my walk on the first day, reminding myself that no matter what, I was going to complete my walk.... then, I kept on getting phone messages, and I had to remind myself - no roadblocks -, then one of my sons asked me to go do something with them , oh it was so tempting, I was putting my runners on trying to think about how I could put my walk aside and do it later.... no roadblocks.

I was feeling pretty proud of myself for recognising all the obstacles that were in my way when I stepped onto my balcony and it started to pour down.... thats when the battle begun within... I said to myself, "Self, If that is not a reason to stay indoors and put your feet up, I don't know what is!" , well Self talked back " Who you trying to kid, girlfriend, You decided to start your exercise program during the coldest, wettest months of the year and think there won't be any rain?"

I also knew that if I decided to turn around and go back inside that my exercise bike and treadmill would both be glaring at me from the top lounge and reminding me that they were there to compensate for the ROADBLOCKS!!

Well, I set off in the rain and am happy to say that I won. So on my first day, I walked 4 kms and got drenched but it was the happiest drenching of my life. There will always be Obstacles, heaps of different Roadblocks to stop me reaching the goals that I have set out before me, my job is to find my way around them.